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xianeUnless you're a musician-type friend of mine, or you're running a meme/sensitive-type post thing, I will be defriending all people who auto-screen comments from friends as I find them.
There's a thin veil of implication of trust when I add someone to my friends list. I *want* their opinions and I'm neither ashamed of them nor nervous to get them. When the same courtesy isn't extended back, we're not friends. I don't need and I don't want anyone in my life that can't stand up to my opinions and thoughts.
You don't have to like this policy; feel free to remove me if it bothers you. I'm not hammering down on obvious and called-for uses of the screen function, I'm talking about people who consistently screen comments after the fact [and hide posts after the fact] when a friend makes a point that they don't like.
If you want to do that, that's fine, it's your journal and you're obviously free to do so. But I find that someone hiding my words for any other reason than to protect everyone in a sensitive situation, or for fun guessing memes, isn't a game I want to play... so I'm pulling the plug.
* If you aren't friended by me, your comments are auto-screened to prevent spamming. I'll reveal 'em as I get 'em. But if you aren't friended by me, and I know you and know you have a journal, there's probably a good reason why I haven't added you. Take that for what you will. LJ isn't a popularity contest for me, it's just frickin' LJ.
I'm not playing these bullshit games.
[edit] - Just to be clear: passive-aggressive screening/deleting is what I'm talking about.
There's a thin veil of implication of trust when I add someone to my friends list. I *want* their opinions and I'm neither ashamed of them nor nervous to get them. When the same courtesy isn't extended back, we're not friends. I don't need and I don't want anyone in my life that can't stand up to my opinions and thoughts.
You don't have to like this policy; feel free to remove me if it bothers you. I'm not hammering down on obvious and called-for uses of the screen function, I'm talking about people who consistently screen comments after the fact [and hide posts after the fact] when a friend makes a point that they don't like.
If you want to do that, that's fine, it's your journal and you're obviously free to do so. But I find that someone hiding my words for any other reason than to protect everyone in a sensitive situation, or for fun guessing memes, isn't a game I want to play... so I'm pulling the plug.
* If you aren't friended by me, your comments are auto-screened to prevent spamming. I'll reveal 'em as I get 'em. But if you aren't friended by me, and I know you and know you have a journal, there's probably a good reason why I haven't added you. Take that for what you will. LJ isn't a popularity contest for me, it's just frickin' LJ.
I'm not playing these bullshit games.
[edit] - Just to be clear: passive-aggressive screening/deleting is what I'm talking about.
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Re: Screening isn't my style.
2006-04-13 14:43 (UTC)You dont take shit, but you also will *listen* to people before you make up your mind, or at least will listen to them and then keep on in your already established direction. You're a strong personality without having to prove yourself, and that's what I like in people.
Some people only want yes-men in their lives, hence the behaviour that I've mentioned that I'm walking away from. I think that I generally try to offer any dissenting opinions in a way that is fair and non-confrontational, and as a friend, I think it's my duty to tell someone when I see something that might hurt them... even if it's their own behaviour. I'm glad you think I've done this well so far, because that's all I ever wanted to be to my friends - helpful and supportive without being mean or pushy or cruel.
Thanks for your words, Mr. Vex.