now playing: "fix yer shit this week" uh, week.

[xiane]

Just to clear up some stuff that I think might not have been so crystal - and totally my fault:

As far as my friends and family goes, I'm the one missing, not anyone else. I have been horribly remiss in TONS of things when it comes to keeping my connections strong, because I've had my head up my ass. I could give you the litany of what's been going on with me, but there's no point in messing up my claiming of responsibility.

The wounds I was picking have to do with the things I left behind when I left Cville, the stuff I loved to be a part of but had to let go. Also, the things that I handled badly, in retrospect.

That's what happens when you write enigmatically, with emotions and some guilt in the forefront, it seems. I have been trying to step up and own my fuckups past and present, and it seems that I'm creating some other issues in my wake. Again, I apologise. As I observed - you'd think I would be better at this after 40 years, but no.

Comments

[crossbonesdj.livejournal.com]

we all look back and think that we would have done things differently, if we only knew what would happen in the future. take those lessons and use them moving forward - dwelling in the past can not fix it.

love you!

[megdalyn.livejournal.com]

*Hugs* We all go through moments like that when we realize the things that we did wrong, sometimes years ago, and want to make amends. You aren't the only one,

[seeliespright.livejournal.com]

*Hugs* I know all about introspection, and have not regretted things in my life yet (I try to live without regret), but am sad for things I have lost. I try to learn from all of my experiences, but often that doesn't serve to lessen the pain.

I have been really missing Katrina the past few days, even though that relationship wasn't healthy for either of us in the end. I miss the conversations with her, our inside jokes, and playfulness. I miss even the tilt of her head and the hours we spent together hanging out.

I have really been missing a great deal of my life in Charlottesville, so I can share in that. :o

[bestiame.livejournal.com]

i ♥ you. come by for coffee the next time you are here.

[endangeredhuman.livejournal.com]

If only we knew then what we know now.