you can't get out if you're already there

[xiane]

I'm still here. I know my updating has been rather slack lately. One of the few things I do miss about my old office job... all the time I had to fart around online, every single day. I knew I had it good, trust me. I was paid to sit around on my ass, answering phones ad doing the occasional office work like fixing the copier or fax machine, or shipping a small amount of packages every week. Mostly I worked on music, chatted online with friends, helped moderate a few mailing lists, created websites, and published my zine. Notice that when Upline went away, I stopped publishing? Wasn't just a coincidence. Wasn't the money, either - well, not in the way you might think. It was simply more of a pain in the ass than it was worth at the time to trek all the way to Kinko's; add on that the people working there at the time were all moronic [at least now I have a highly competent friend that works there, yay!] and it all adds up to: not worth it. Of course, now I'm working on trying to publish things again, but it is a slow and leisurely process; no stress there. Still, I miss having all that [highly] paid time to do whatever I liked as long as I did my job, too.
Coyote also has a good chunk of that, also... just without the T3, free long distance, high powered computers at the ready, carpeted floors and posh chairs, endless air conditioning, and ridiculously high pay. Still, I work for awesome people, I get to look the way I want and work on my crap all day, listen to my own music, and tell people to get the fuck out if they are jerks. This is a great job. I can't complain about it at all.

> Lots of eating at The Guad, sitting out on the patio under the umbrellas while eating delicious chile rellenos and throwing chips to the millions of sparrows and chickadees and starlings that so kindly keep the area crumb-free. It feels like a decadent pastime to eat there, with the stone fountain nearby and the cool breezes and mountain views to soothe me... but food there is so cheap! It is an indulgence that we can afford, and it is a small thing that makes me happy.
> Night swimming at Anne's pool, with a horde of nude and semi-nude friends. [I keep my clothes on. Some things need to stay a mystery, people.] I could just float there for hours, looking up at the star-strewn night sky. Even without my glasses, I can see them fairly well, at least the brighter ones and the planets that might be visible. Being in the water with friends is lovely, and you can do your own thing or play around as desired and no one minds.
> The Dawning. Terminal Ready shows always stress me out a bit, since it is briskpepper's band - so of course I want everything to go perfectly. I try to keep in mind that not everyone will like them, sound issues will happen [it's the Rose, for corn's sake], some people prefer dancing to live bands, regardless of the band. Look, it is me, and I worry. That's what I do. Regardless of worrying or not, the night went well - especially considering that we were going up against a really good show somewhere else: The Station Break II CD release party at Plan 9, with headliners Bella Morte. I'm really appreciative that some people came out to both shows - that rocks!

>> totally aside... Yet another thing I love about the scene here: the people here really care. It isn't all lip service to make them sound more important. They try to come out every week, even if it isn't a band they particularly like or know. If things aren't making them happy, most of them tell me what's wrong without being complainy - and if they're happy, they are VERY vocal and supportive. I am really protective of the scene here, and not just because I've put a lot of my own energy into it. I don't own the club night or the scene here - the people who come out do, and they treat it with care and put their own energy into it. They're really respectful of my efforts, which makes me a very grateful chica... and they're willing to step up and get involved, too. I can't say enough good things about the Cville scene, and it is obvious that other people see it too, as every band that's come here leaves us with glowing praise. We rock!

Back to my summation of XianeLife...

> I really like people. I know that seems to put me in a minority. I don't like everything that we do, but in general, I really enjoy interactions with my fellow humans. If that makes me a freak, so be it. [and I know some smartass out there is going to say, "no, that's not what makes you a freak, Xiane." Yeah, yeah, yeah.]
> Spending four hours with nothingoth spinning goth rock, then electronica, on the radio? Fucking awesome. Thanks to audiorapture for letting us fuck around with his show, Download. That kicked ass.
> Talked to Kyle [of Logic Of Decay] last night about the new musical project that we're going to be working on. I think rat_bastard is also going to be involved, playing guitar. Soonish there might actually be some new music with my vocals on it out there again! And maybe, just maybe... if things work out... we might play a show or two. I miss live performances so much. That's the best drug in the world.


It looks like it might storm again. That means, of course, that I won't have to brave the mosquito-ridden back yard to water my plants tonight. As long as my basement doesn't flood... *crosses fingers*

Comments

[silent-muse.livejournal.com]

Hey. . . if loving people makes you a freak, we should all be a bit more freakish. . .

[crossbonesdj.livejournal.com]

i'm really looking forward to coming to spin now. i need a little more tlc in the scene!