[disclaimer: this is not about me. It is not about you. This is fiction. If you're looking for personal drama, fuck off.]
I watch him, out of the corner of my eye. I see the little glances he gives me, when he thinks no one is looking... I catch how he hangs on my words. He tries to be nonchalant. Maybe he doesn't even realize how he's acting or how he seems to feel about me. It makes me nervous. It intrigues me. It is dangerous. It is exciting. I have no business liking his interest in me. If I told him that I sometimes think about him, that I have some very secret fantasies that I would never admit to anyone... well, he might deny his attention if put on the spot. I guess I couldn't blame him. As I said - this is dangerous. We would be playing with fire - I'm sure you know all the cliches about these sorts of attractions. No need to elaborate.
I don't usually acknowledge my momentary obsessions. I assume that most people look at me and think I am easily understood, categorized, dismissed. I like it when they think that... it makes my life easier. He has caught something that others miss in me, or why else would he be so interested? I don't like this. I like it too much.
I watch him, out of the corner of my eye. I see the little glances he gives me, when he thinks no one is looking... I catch how he hangs on my words. He tries to be nonchalant. Maybe he doesn't even realize how he's acting or how he seems to feel about me. It makes me nervous. It intrigues me. It is dangerous. It is exciting. I have no business liking his interest in me. If I told him that I sometimes think about him, that I have some very secret fantasies that I would never admit to anyone... well, he might deny his attention if put on the spot. I guess I couldn't blame him. As I said - this is dangerous. We would be playing with fire - I'm sure you know all the cliches about these sorts of attractions. No need to elaborate.
I don't usually acknowledge my momentary obsessions. I assume that most people look at me and think I am easily understood, categorized, dismissed. I like it when they think that... it makes my life easier. He has caught something that others miss in me, or why else would he be so interested? I don't like this. I like it too much.