(no subject)

Why do I drive myself so hard, and why is it when I try to take a break and relax, I feel like I'm slacking off? I mean, I do so damn much... why do I have this need to rule myself with an iron will? Makes no sense.

So it is 2002. Okay. Big deal... yeah. I'm not a resolution-maker - I figure if I want to change something about my life, I'm just going to get up and do it. Not to knock anyone making resolutions; everyone needs some sort of inspiration in something. I just don't do it, myself. I know damn well that I need to work less and create more, and that I have to stop doing everything for everyone else. Surrounding myself with positive people would be nice too, though a bit of a pipe dream, I fear. *shrug* I like what I have, and who I am, and where I've been and seem to be going. I'm 35, I don't look like it, I have a million projects and a thousand dreams... I'm not starving, I have some people who seem to love me very much, and I'm definitely not ready to die. I think that's a good set of definers.

I've even started to dream again.